Past Lover
by Katetodd4eva
Summary: a case reminds Kate of her past which has drastic affects on her and Gibbs' relationship


The house was dark and silent. The bedroom where Kate and Gibbs slept was only filled with their breathing. Gibbs' arm rests gently over Kate's stomach as they sleep. Their eyes flutter as their heads are filled with dreams, but all not good. Kate's breathing started to increase and her eyes started to dart under eyelids. She started to squirm underneath Gibbs' arm. She then sat up with a start. She tried to control her breathing but it was no good. The darkness of the room was not helping the situation. She felt his big hands on her back and his soothing voice in her ear.  
" Hey, its ok" he said softly kissing her on the cheek. She turned to look at him. His face filled with concern and tiredness. She couldn't do this anymore. He deserved better and she did believe that she was meant to be his but not after the week they have just had.  
" Gibbs I am so sorry. I cant do it" she said getting up and grabbing her clothes and shoes.  
" What are you talking about? Come back to bed" he said tiredly.  
" I cant. I have to go" she said as she got dressed as quickly as possible. He jumped out of bed and started after her as she left the room.  
" Kate, I know this past week on you" he said.  
" Gibbs…just leave it ok. I'll see you tomorrow" she said and left. He stood there as he heard her car start up and leave. He ran his fingers through his hair and made his way back to bed. It was 3am and he had to be at work in another 4 hours. He knew he had to go back to sleep but he couldn't.

The past weeks case proved a bit to much for the strong Kate Todd. The team got called out to a car accident that had involved a Petty Officer. They don't normally deal with simple car accidents but this one look very suspicious as he had ran into a power pole but had pant marks and dints to the rear of the car. As soon as they got to the scene Kate had a flash back to her teenage years.  
It was when she was 17 and she had met her soul mate. They were on their way home from a camping trip and were almost home when a deer jumped out in front of them. Her boyfriend was driving and slammed on the brakes which made the car slide all over the road and hit a tree which killed him instantly while Kate walked away with only a few cuts and bruises.  
Since then she has dated loads of guys and they just don't make her feel the way he did, until she met Gibbs of course. Although he can be a bastard and it took 3 years but they have been dating for 4 months and it has been perfect. Well until now. The dream and the case is an obvious sign that something terrible is going to happen…not to her but to the one she loves, Gibbs.

Kate walked out of the elevator and headed to the bullpen. She saw Tony already sitting at his desk stuffing his face with what she can only guess was a donut and a milkshake.  
" Morning Kate" he said as he swallowed a mouthful of donut. she didn't reply or even look at him. Tony exchanged a look with McGee who had also noticed the unusual quietness of her.  
She put her stuff in the corner of her cubicle and sat down at her desk, place her elbows on the desk and put her head in her hands.  
" Hey Kate, if you ever need to talk we are all here for you" McGee said softly.  
She looked up at him and gave a slight smile then put her head back into her hands.  
The elevator dings again and Gibbs hurriedly steps out and makes his way to the bullpen. He throws his coat onto his chair and places his coffee on his desk and goes back to Kate's desk. He leans on it and gets close to her.  
" We need to talk, now" he said softly in her ear. She took a breath, pushed herself away from her desk and walked past him and towards the elevator where they always have their private meetings. Gibbs stood up and followed her. Tony and McGee watched in aw.  
" I bet they had a fight" McGee said quietly.  
" Yeah, who do you think won?" Tony said.

Kate entered the elevator as the last two people got out and Gibbs ran in after her. The doors closed and he pushed the emergency button to make it stop.  
" What happened last night?" he asked looking at her.  
" I don't want to talk about" she said softly leaning against the rail behind her.  
" You are angry at me when I don't want to talk to you and when I want to talk you don't so please tell me what am I supposed to do here" he said a bit angry.  
" Nothing. Just forget about us" she said.  
" What?" he asked. She looked up at him.  
" Us, Gibbs. We are over ok. I cant do it anymore. I don't want you to get hurt" she said firmly.  
" No its not ok, Kate. Its taken us 3 years to get to where we are and you are just going to push me away" he started to yell.  
" I'm sorry Gibbs"  
" Just tell me why?" he asked calming himself down.  
" I cant" she said not looking at him. He ran a hand through his hair.  
" You want to end it but you cant even give me a reason" he starts to raise his voice again. She doesn't look at him. He slowly walks over to her and with one hand lifts her face to face him.  
" Look me in the eyes and tell me you don't love me" he said sternly. Her eyes darted around his. He could see her eyes swelling up with tears.  
" I…I" she started. She walked away from him, pressed the emergency button and the elevator started going and the doors opened. She practically ran out of the elevator and went straight to the bathroom.  
Gibbs was still in the elevator.  
' I knew it' he thought to himself. He went over and pushed a button to go down to autopsy.

The door dinged open and he exited to find Ducky putting a boy away.  
" Duck" he said.  
" Ah Jethro what a nice surprise" he said turning around to see him in the door way. He could see Gibbs' flustered expression.  
" What's happened?" Ducky asked moving towards him.  
" What's Kate said to you?" he asked.  
" What about?"  
" Duck" he said with a stare.  
" Ok, but don't tell her I showed you" he said moving over to his desk and pulled out a file from his top drawer and handed it to Gibbs.  
He opened it and found a photo of a boy no older then 18 with deep cuts all over his face.  
" What's this got to do with Kate?" he asked.  
" Read the report" Ducky said sitting down.  
" 18 year old Thomas Brown and 17 year old Caitlin Todd were travelling South on the night of July 7th 1994 when a deer jumped out in front of them. Brown hit the brakes causing the car to slide along the road and hit a tree killing him instantly. Miss Todd escaped the crash with small cuts and bruisers" he read. He looked up at Ducky.  
" The crash involving the Petty Officer reminded her of that crash, in which she lost the first boy she ever loved. She has been having dreams Jethro, which she believes is a sign of bad things to come" Ducky told him.  
" She cant honestly believe that" Gibbs said.  
" Jethro she loves you and doesn't want to see you hurt" he explained. Gibbs closed the file and gave it back to Ducky.  
" Thanks Duck" he said and left.

He entered the bullpen expecting to see Kate back at her desk by now but all he saw was McGee and Tony. He stopped in the middle of the bullpen.  
" Where's Kate?" he asked.  
" Don't know boss" McGee said.  
" She hasn't come back after leaving with you" Tony said looking at Gibbs in wonder. Gibbs just nods his head and goes to leave when the director calls for him. He hesitates but obeys.  
Kate finally returns, not looking at either Tony or McGee.  
" Gibbs was looking for you" Tony says as she sits down at his desk.  
" Was he" she says plainly.  
" Did you guys have a fight?" Tony asks. She doesn't answer him.  
" You know I'm here if you want to talk about it" he says.  
" No thanks" she says.  
" Well you need to talk to somebody. McGee is a good listener" Tony says pointing at him.  
" Tony I don't want or need to talk to anybody" she says angrily. She looks at Tony and McGee's shocked faces at her little outburst.  
" Tell Gibbs I've gone home for the day" she said softly picking up her things and leaving. Once she was gone Tony and McGee turned to each other.  
" Oh yeah big fight" McGee said with a nod.  
" Your telling me" Tony said sitting down at his desk.  
45 minuets later Gibbs came bounding down the stairs and into the bullpen, he looked over at Kate's desk and then looked at Tony.  
" Uh she went home boss" he told him.  
" Why"  
" I don't know" he said. Gibbs didn't say anymore, just sat at his desk and waited for 5pm to go and see her.

Kate sat on her lounge staring into space.  
' What have I done?' she thought to herself. She put her head on the cushion she was cuddling. Her phone started to ring. She reached out and picked it off the coffee table and looked at the caller ID 'Gibbs'. She flipped it open and rejected the call. It rang a couple of more times and she just ignored it. Then she almost jumped out of her skin as there was a knock at her door.  
She got up and without thinking she opened the door.  
" Gibbs, what are you doing here?" she said.  
" Need to talk to you" he said and invited himself in. She closed the door behind him and turned around to face him.  
" Well, talk" she said.  
" Who was Thomas Brown?" he asked looking at her. She suddenly straightened and starred at him.  
" What?" she asked softly.  
" Thomas Brown. Your first love who died in a car accident" he said stepping closer to her. She starred into his eyes, burning him with her stare.  
" How do you know about him" she said.  
" I talked to Ducky and it wasn't his fault he told me" he said. She didn't say anything just kept starring at him.  
" Is he the reason your not married and have kids, because all the men you have dated are not like him" he said almost interrogating her. He stepped closer with every word until he was standing right in front of her looking down at her face.  
" Is that why you gave up on us? Because I'm not like Tomas Brown" he said and without warning her hand came up and slapped is face. He had been slapped so many times in the past he really didn't care anyway by his standards he deserved it. Kate on the other hand couldn't believe what she had done. She kept her ground though. Gibbs looked back at her.  
" Kate I know lose and I know you have to get over it. It hurts but to make it stop hurting you need to get over it and move on" he said. Her eyes started to soften as he spoke as he was telling the truth. He leaned down and kissed her.  
" We have come this far, do you really want to give up now" he asked. She dropped her head and walked back towards the door and opened it. Gibbs looked at her but she didn't look at him. He got her message loud and clear.  
" Fine" he said softly and walked out. She slowly started to close the door behind him but decided to take one look at him. He was walking slowly down the path towards his car. Her heart started to pound in her chest and her head started to yell at her.  
' Say I love you. Just say it' her head screamed. She opened the door and stood in the doorway.  
" Gibbs" she called out. He stopped and turned around to see her standing there, a flustered look on her face. He looked at her as she just stood there trying to gather up the words she wanted to say.  
" I…I love you" she called out to him again. A smile started to spread across his face. She saw it and one appeared on her face to. He made his way back up the path and took her in his arms and kissed her. Their kisses filled with Love, lust and passion for each other. He moved them inside and closed the door. He pulled back from her and looked at her.  
" I'm sorry" he said. He didn't want to hurt her with her past but he didn't know what else to do to get her back.  
" So am I" she said and kissed him again.


End file.
